Wholeheartedness

Lately God has been gently correcting me for resenting and resisting the inconveniences and sacrifices involved in being a stay at home wife and mother.  

It started when I started reflecting on the theme for MOPS this year: "Plunge: Love as if your life depended on it." 

I looked up the passage from 1 Peter 1:7-11 (the Message translation) from which the theme was taken.  As I interpreted it in view of how it applied to my role as a mother, I was convicted.  

 ^7-11Everything in the world is about to be wrapped up, so take nothing for granted. Stay wide-awake in prayer. Most of all, love each other as if your life depended on it. Love makes up for practically anything. Be quick to give a meal to the hungry, a bed to the homeless—cheerfully. Be generous with the different things God gave you, passing them around so all get in on it: if words, let it be God's words; if help, let it be God's hearty help. That way, God's bright presence will be evident in everything through Jesus, and he'll get all the credit as the One mighty in everything—encores to the end of time. Oh, yes!

The words "cheerful" and "generous" in particular stood out as correctives for me. 

Too often lately I have been irritable and stingy with my family, keeping track of what I'd done for them and how much (or how little) they had been doing for me.

A few days later, I happened to pick my copy of Sally Clarkson's The Mission of Motherhood off my bookshelf.  I had read it once before when C was a baby and felt inspired, but put it aside and forgot much of the message within.

I came to this quote on page 72 and was encouraged in how to replace the irritable stinginess with cheerful generosity:

“Attitude, I have found, makes all the difference when it comes to serving our children. Serving with joy in the midst of messes and difficulty can only be done when we walk in the power of the Holy Spirit. When we are joyful and see each minute with our children as an opportunity to worship God through our service of him, our children sense our joy and feel secure and happy.” 

 There are several areas where I've gotten off track in living up to my gentle parenting ideals lately.  I need to renew my mind with proper perspective and tools.  But first and foremost, I need to renew the invitation for the Holy Spirit to be constantly filling me in this challenging endeavor of mothering well.

I want to be a wholehearted mother, embracing the mess, tedium and repetition and staying in the moment with my children rather than seeking excessive escapes.