Monday, August 10, 2009

Grace-Full Parenting Article

There are great tips for leavening discipline with grace in this 2005 article by Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller. I've quoted the key points below (with some commentary or interpretation of my own in parentheses):

    • Assume the stance that mistakes are permitted here.
    • Separate the deed from the doer.
    • Accept that what is...is. (don't get hung up in your emotional reaction to
      the child's behavior)
    • See it all as perfect. (see mistakes as perfect teaching moments)
    • See your children as unfinished.
    • Make no assumptions. (no mind reading or fortune telling)
    • Focus on the situation, not on the child's character or personality.
    • Implement consequences with an open heart. (consequences don't have to be severe to be effective)
    • Give second opportunities.
    • Search for solutions. (take a problem-solving and teaching approach)
    • Look for the gift.
    • Stay in the present.

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